12 Warning Signs to Watch For

Teenager's emotions (and behaviors) often swing from one extreme to another. They don't act like adults and that can make it difficult to know when to seek professional help for them.

In Untangled, Lisa Damour states, "Paradoxically, it's often time to worry when a teenager's behavior isn't all over the map." Later she describes an experience she had in graduate school. Her professor handed her a stack of inkblot tests and said, "Double-check the age of the person whose test you are scoring. If it's a teenager, but you think it's a grown-up, you'll conclude that you have a psychotic adult. But that's just a normal teenager." I might have laughed out loud when I read that. :) 

Here are 12 things to watch for in your teenager:

1. They try to act younger than they are on a consistent basis (Peter Pan Syndrome).
2. They are trying to rush into adulthood (experimenting with sex, drugs, or drinking).
3. They have no friends and are socially isolated.
4. Their emotions are so out of whack they can't function.
5. They are overly critical of themselves or others. 
6. They are bullying other people or being bullied.
7. They can't get along with authority figures.
8. They are obsessed with planning the future or they refuse to consider what the future might hold (especially for older teens).
9. They have no interest in becoming independent and moving out.
10. They bounce from romantic relationship to romantic relationship or they change drastically to be accepted by a romantic partner.
11. They have developed an eating disorder and obsess over how they look.
12. They aren't learning to take care of their physical health or they are abusing their bodies.

While there are more, these cover a decent range. It's good to look at four areas: emotional, mental, physical, and social. If your gut is telling you something is off in any of those areas, consider looking for a counselor. If you can't afford or get to a therapist, you can reach out to the school counselor when school is back in session. There are also a lot of books and articles that can help you know what you can do as a parent to help your teen. 

If you have any questions or concerns, please email me at rachelle@theinspiredteen.com. I would love to chat with you. You are not alone!